Joe has soccer practice at 5:30. Sarah has a soccer game at 6:00. Susie has band practice at 4:30. Mom has a meeting until 6:00 and Dad can't leave the office until 5:00. Yikes! Does this schedule sound familiar to you? Many families in the US face hectic schedules like this on a daily basis. Kids and parents are running themselves ragged and often in opposite directions. This leaves very little time to spend together as a family. Unfortunately, a low amount of family time can lead to problems for your children.
There is research that indicates that children do better in school and psychologically when they have adequate family time. The research also shows that teens may be less likely to engage in risky behavior when they have family time. If you feel like your family needs to spend more time together, the following suggestions can help.
Quality time is the key, not necessarily quantity. When you have a few minutes with your kids before school or while driving them to their after school activities, be sure to take advantage of this precious time. Ask some open-ended questions (questions that require more than a yes or no response) to get the conversation rolling. For example: "What's your favorite part of playing basketball?" "What was the best part of your day?" "What three things are you grateful for today?" In addition to taking advantage of these little moments together, it is important to plan some activities that will bring your family closer together.
Schedule family dinners. Let each child pick the menu for a night (you could focus on different regions of the world each time). Then get everyone involved in the cooking process. Even small children can help with simple tasks. During dinner let each person share about their day. Play the grateful game – see who can name the most things for which they are grateful.
Laugh together. Create a playful lighthearted atmosphere. Watch funny movies or TV shows together. Have each person responsible to find a joke for the day and share with the family. Laughter helps reduce stress and can bring people closer together.
Play together. It seems to me that families don't get out and play together much anymore. Take the family outside and play football, horseshoes, or go hiking. Have a family game night and take turns letting each person choose a game. I think that a family that plays together stays together.
Create a family album. Have each child take pictures of the family for a week. When everyone has had their turn with the camera, bring the family together to work on creating a digital album. Make the album available online for relatives to view.
Make TV time count. When you watch TV, don't settle for a passive activity. Get engaged and start a discussion about the show. Encourage the children to think about what they are watching.
Compliment contest. Hold a contest to see who gives the most compliments. The compliments need to be genuine and heartfelt for this to work. Each person needs to be on the lookout for good things in the other family members. You’ll be surprised how this can dissolve hostilities and create a pleasant nurturing environment.
Good deeds. Find a cause or charity to support. Volunteer once a month (or more frequently if time permits). You could serve food at a shelter or work with a local children’s hospital. Go green together. Do some research on ways to help the environment and then map out a plan to make your home and lives greener.
No matter how busy your family is, you can find some ways to improve the quality of the time you spend together. This can help everyone feel better about themselves and strengthen the relationships. A strong healthy family unit is one of the most powerful things parents can offer their children.
